How I got started: part 1

1. Us in reflected in the side of a space capsule in DC...because every blog needs a photo.

2. The "Force Field" button on the previous post photo next to David (How could you even see that?) plays part of the Imperial March and was purchased at Hallmark 12 months ago.

3. I forgot to add the current book I am reading (recommended by the psychologist who completed Alex's testing for Dyslexia) is Overcoming Dyslexia by Sally Shaywitz, MD

4. You'd think I'd tell you how I came up with our curriculum first. But that is part 2. To me, the most important thing you need when thinking about homeschooling is support.

You can do it without support but it is more than a world of difference with it.
My husband was on board right away. The grandparents were supportive but cautious. The pediatrician, developmental pediatrician, the therapists and teachers were mostly silent with a raised eyebrow.

There is a lady that lives a few houses up from me that home-schools her kids, but I don’t know her and feel weird knocking on her door and saying, “could you please explain to me how you homeschool?” Would you mind if a neighbor knocked on your door to ask questions about homeschooling?

* Well, if you knocked on my door you'd most likely see us all in our pajamas.

*Blazing your own trail is all fine and good....unless there is already a nicely paved road. I like to find people who are where I want to be...just a little ahead of me. I sought out homeschool moms to talk to. Save that trail blazing energy for improtant things...like building a volcano.

*Most homeschool parents love to talk about it. When you homeschool it isn't just a thing you do, it is more of a lifestyle. Now, most people don't like to talk about themselves as much as I do, but they probably will be thrilled to tell you what they think,do, etc. I'd introduce yourself to the lady down the street and then ask to talk to her about it later. Like invite her over or something.

*I wouldn't know half the stuff I do about what is available to me in my area if it weren't for getting together with other homeschool moms. I went to plenty of homschool groups and stuff. I didn't join them all. In fact, aside from the classes they take, I'm not a part of a co-op or anything. I googled and searched on line and still didn't find half the info I got just from sitting with a few moms with a pen and paper in hand. And when they mention a web site....write it down.

*The best thing about talking with other families who home school is learning what is available in your area and building from there. The worst thing about talking with other homeschool families is that you can't help but compare yourself, kids and what you are teaching to that they are doing.

*I met one lady who had her kids say the pledge every morning. I thought, I need to do that. For some reason, my kids really really didn't like doing this. I was making them hate the pledge. Instead, I taught them about it and what it means. They like it now...as long as we don't have to say it each morning. I only did this because I thought I needed to copy the other mom.

* When I go a a scrapbooking event, like CHA, it is refreshing to talk to other scrapbookers because they "get it." It is the same thing when talking to other homschoolers. They get what you are about. You don't have to explain yourself...or feel like you have to explain yourself. People are going to ask you questions about your choices. Feeling like you have a support system makes thier questions not become your questions.

* I didn't have to find these people all on my own, once I mentioned to a few friends (who were not homeschoolers) that I was going to homeschool, they started talking about other people that they knew who did it too. I met one of my best friends and the family we hang out with the most that way.

* Finally, we all need someone to tell us we are doing a good job. That we are making the right choices. As much as I believe I am doing the best thing for my boys, there are plenty of times I question it all. And for that, I appreciate people like Dixie Lee who left me the nicest message saying she thinks I am doing a good job:) Thank you for that.

* So, how did you find your support system for homeschooling? Or for parenting in general?

Comments

[Sarah]

Awesome.
I totally agree with you on the support thing. There's a good number of women in my church who are homeschooling and we finally all got together and have a monthly coffee talk together. Sometimes it's a vent session. Usually we all come armed with new discoveries to share and ideas to make our lives as mothers and teachers easier and bearable!
Great post, Kelli!
Can't wait for part deux!
~Sarah

[Michelle]

Kelli, you are one of a kind. I have been reading your blog for well over a year now and I feel like I know you...(creepy coming from a stranger). You a very generous person sharing your outlooks and feelings with us and most of all just taking a chance in hopes that you can help someone "out there". Your scrapbooking stlye is awesome! I just don't know how you do it all!! Thanks for providing motivation. Your blog is great! And your pictures are great too!
It takes someone special to homeschool too! Have a great day!!

[Michelle Baker]

I guess I'm lucky living in Alaska when it comes to homeschooling. We have more homeschooled kids per capita here than any other state. Probably purely because of logistics. But it certainly cuts down on the raised eyebrows. ;)
My friend just finished "Overcoming Dyslexia" and said it was super helpful.
Right now my kids go to a charter school with multi-age classrooms. My 2nd grader is in a K-2 class and my 5th and 7th graders are in a 3rd-8th grade classroom. Next year they'll all be in the same room (if I decide not to homeschool my youngest).
Thanks again for sharing your experiences!

[AmberCA]

I have to agree with these other ladies here, you are awesome! I love your straightforwardness, I am always a little apprehensive to bring up that I homeschool because you never know how people will respond. I love it, love it, love it! We have had great success so far. I have a 5th and 3rd grader, and this point we see no need to stop doing what we are doing. All my support comes from my local homeschool group (our school covering) love those ladies, we help each other through it. It is definately a calling, and not for everyone...it is a lifestyle, we consider everything a homeschooling experience.
Keep it up, Kelly!

Amber Osburn

[TNS]

Four Moms started talking about homeschooling when our daughters were all in first grade. I can say the teacher that year wasn't that great, but that wasn't the main motivating factor. Individually we each had thoughts about doing it before we mentioned it to each other. Now our group has grown to over 40 children. I think it has helped the kids the most to feel like they're not doing something strange by not being in school. We do group activities once or twice a month but really it is getting together with 1 or 2 of the families that is our main support.

Thanks for sharing your story. I love your confidence and enthusiasm about sharing your experience. Like others have said I'm not always eager to proclaim we homeschool because I think people don't understand that it's really quite normal :)

[Deirdre]

Loved your point about how much of David's resources were being used up just being in a full classroom daily. I think that is true for so many kids to different degrees.

Your boys remind me of my two, that I'd love for you to post some gift recommendations. You wouldn't mind doing that right? Not like you're busy or anything?

I've got 2 birthdays and with Xmas just over, I'm stumped...and really don't want to spend $100 for a millenium falcon on ebay (though I'm tempted!).
Thanks!

[Kim]

You don't know me....I feel I have come to know you through your blog...I too am a homeschool mom. Age 11, 6 and a 3 week old. I appreciate your comments. Esp. when you mention how important support is so that when you are questioned...the questions do not become your own. And the desire to hear once in a while...that yes I am doing a good job!
THank you for sharing!

[Jen]

When we first started homeschooling, I was tenative to mention it to others, especially if I wouldn't have time to "explain myself." Now I try to mention it whenever I can, even when my kids are not with me. I like to think that by mentioning it whenever I can, I am getting people thinking about it. I have been pleasantly surprised with the positive responses. In many cases people have told me that they have a friend who homeschools. I hope that I have not only encouraged someone to "think outside the box," but also helped them to see that their friend is not unusual in her choice of schooling.

Thank you for taking the time to post these discussions!
They are encouraging to me.

[Sarah]

Yes, this is super encouraging. How did I find my support group? Well I had a built in one before, friends that homeschooled before my first was born, so it was a given I would homeschool too after seeing them with their children and it was amazing support. Then we moved. And that was a lot harder. Add two more kids to the mix and I was really needing a support group. I found a co-op more just to please my mil that we were "socializing" this group was insane with over 100 kids in it. Amazing for socialization but not much so on calmness and "real relationships" So I left the group, along with another mom who felt the same way. Now we meet every friday and get together with 2 other families from church. Our kids play, we drink coffee, nurse our babies together and keep each other sane. We also plan fun, non stressful field trips once a month. Best support ever.

[Michelle]

I'm very proud of you for homeschooling

[paige]

you are obviously an amazing fun & creative mom. i think its so cool how you "know" your children so specifically. how you connect with each of their needs. how you do what you need to do , for them.
you go girl
xo

[jody ferlaak]

I found my support system for parenting fairly early on. When I had my first..."I knew everything and was going to do things my way."
It didn't work.
At all.
SO I learned.
I learned I needed other people...even when I didn't want to admit it.
I learned I need to be humble and to see and listen and be open- before I can ever think about directing, guiding or influencing someone else's heart, soul or mind in a positive way.
I learned that there is no such thing as 'right' or 'wrong'...but there are principles and morals that direct me to the best answers/ways for me and my family.
I have talked many times about homeschooling...and find that the biggest reason I don't is not support or ability...but that God has other plans for me and my kids right now. SO I just keep waiting on Him.
That's the best place we all can be.
Love your thoughts and openness and honesty {and wit!} all the time.
Thank you.

[Penny]

Knock on her door... she will be happy to share, when you explain why. And it is likely that there is a local support group for homeschoolers (this was probably already mentioned)
I went to a garage sale once, could tell my the items that they homeschooled, and we talked for over an hour about it!

[TracieClaiborne]

I love it when you talk homeschooling. You are SO RIGHT, homeschooling Moms love to talk about it because it's such a huge part of our lives. I couldn't live without my homeschool group. We meet only a couple of times a month but just having those people there to connect with and knowing they're only an e-mail or phone call away makes such a huge difference. Also, seeing all the other great kids makes me feel like we're part of something special.

[Lynne]

Thank you so much for sharing your experiences with homeschooling, Kelli! Hearing about these has really encouraged me. I have been considering homeschooling since 1994, when I taught public school for one year. I hated it. That was before I was even married. This year, my oldest is in full-day kindergarten, and I have been very disappointed with the experience. I have always thought about homeschooling, but now I am seriously considering it and researching it, and I think it is best for both of my daughters' learning styles. I am looking forward to trying it next year! Thanks again for sharing!

[Susi (dragonflydreamer)]

I live in a small town in the Blue Ridge Mountains of Virginia. We just got our first traffic light. Many families home school their children for different reasons. Our public library is a great resource because often they do things as a group such as field trips, sharing science equipment, using computers, crafting, etc... My sons are now grown, but if I could do it all over, I would have chosen to home school my oldest son until he was old enough to attend a performing arts school. When I was trying to figure it out, I found a series of books written by E.D. Hirsch with "Everything a First Grader Needs to Know" on up atleast through Jr. High School. He has studied the European educational system and how they build a foundation early and teach the same core cirriculum. Hirsch believes that there is core knowlegedge that everyone needs to learn to be well educated and fully rounded. Most of the home schooled kids in our area go on to score high on the SATs too. I really admire you and wish you the best!